In all honesty, I had a crappy pregnancy- I felt terrible, I had a higher risk pregnancy, so therefore I had lots of restrictions. People would tell me "difficult pregnancy=easy baby".
"Good." I thought. "I deserve a sweet, little, chill, docile baby, who sleeps when it is supposed to, and it will be quiet and smiley, and allow me to tote him or her wherever I need to go without complaint."
Instead I got Miss Priss. Incredibly adorable? Without a doubt! Easy? Hell to the no.
When meeting a friend's 2 month old baby the other day I felt a pang of envy. The baby was so good- carted around in his carrier, alternating between light snoozing and gently sucking on his pacifier, without making a peep. Miss Priss is far less fussy now, but especially during her first four months, leaving her in her car seat anywhere was a bit of an impossibility. Thank goodness for the Baby Bjorn, or else we not have a lick of food in the house, after the first grocery store experience in her car seat. I was constantly on tenterhooks, waiting for a meltdown. Although, to be fair, Dell Harper is far quieter and better behaved in public than she is at home. And when she is happy she is very happy, smiling with her whole being.
She cries with her whole being, too.
We are finally starting to grow out of the reflux (knock, knock, knock on wood!), and its management has been key (thank you, Prevacid!). Upon reflection, and almost six months survival, I am grateful for my fussy little reflux baby. She is immensely curious, and will concentrate for long periods of time playing with a watch, or watching bees eat from a flower. She is always on the go- ready to wiggle or roll. Yes, she cried a lot. However, she also laughs and smiles a lot- with my little drama queen there is never a dull moment. Maybe a "good" baby would have bored the pants off me. After all, I have been know to be rather vocal and dramatic myself. We just like to keep things interesting around here!
I like how vocal she is- she lets her presence be known! Her voice is slowly becoming a little less reflux raspy, and her pain is decidedly less. I remember talking to one of the nurses at Dell Harper's doctor. "Why is she still colicky at four months?" I complained. "The books says it ends at three months! Why is she fussing like this?"
"Oh, honey, you got another few months. Six months, it'll get better. You just gotta wait." she patiently replied to me.
And it has gotten better. My little girl is constantly giggling to herself, and will chill out if needed. I can take her places now without the fear of having to hustle her out in a hurry. And, good Lord, how she entertains me! Since having a fussy baby, I feel more confident in my mothering abilities. I got put through a bit of a ringer, and I could handle it.
I feel like sometimes we are scared to admit to a having a colicky baby. After I rather sheepishly tell friends that Dell Harper is a bit tough, I hear stories of their colicky kids- news to me! No one likes a whiner, so we don't want to go on about how our adored babies are fusspots. However, I have decided that I am proud of my reflux baby! We have a rough go, and are stronger for it. I appreciate her good moods so much more after experiencing the bad moods. In all fairness, dealing with my own reflux puts me in a bad mood as well, so I can understand her distress.
Also, I must add that Miss Priss has and continues to be an excellent sleeper (for the most part), on schedule and in her own bed.
So, I am the proud mama of a colicky baby, and love her all the more for it. After all, I do love a challenge!
That being said, I will not complain if my next baby is a reflux-free angel baby.
Hee.
