Tips and Tricks for New Moms Going Back to Work

The other night Peg was asking me about my schedule, and how I do feeding in the morning before work, etc. Now, I am not sure why she was asking me, as she is the mother of 11 month old triplets and still manages to look perfectly polished at all times.  I just have one baby and can't remember my mascara half the time.

However, it really helped me before I went back to work to see other people's schedules, and I wanted to compile all the wonderful advice you readers gave me. 

Look at my desk!  Is that not awful?

So, basic schedule:

6:00 AM- wake up, throw on makeup

6:30 AM- Miss Priss wakes up, I give her Prevacid, we let out and feed Buddy

7:00 AM- feed the baby

7:30 AM- hand Miss Priss over to Hubs, and throw on some clothes

8:00 AM-4:50 PM- work.  I bring my lunch and eat at my desk.  I pump once when I get to work, while I eat my oatmeal (notice vital elements- chair blocking office door, breakfast and diet coke).  Thanks to my goofy hands free "bustier" (sooo sexy, let me tell you!), I can work away while pumping.  I pump again in the afternoon after lunch.  Each time last about 30-45 minutes, including prep time.

5:00 PM- Before I give that sweet child kisses, I race to change into "play clothes" and get my dry clean onlies away from my reflux baby.  As soon as that is done I scoop her up and feed her (she has a "cluster feed" at this time).  Her sitter and I discuss her day briefly, then she heads home. 

5:30 PM- walk.  Hubs and Buddy come along if Hubs is home.

6:00 PM- do any dinner prep I can while Miss Priss plays on her activity mat, or chills in the swing.  If it is a bad day, we will sit outside and chill out.

6:30 PM- start bath. Depending on what's going on Hubs will take care of bath while I work on dinner, or he might go pick something up if I have been a slacker.

7:00-7:20 PM- after bath I put on her pjs, feed her dinner, say her prayers, put her in a sleep sack and say goodnight!

7:20-10:00 or 11:00 PM- I eat dinner with Hubs, then my real work starts. Hubs and I clean up the kitchen from dinner. Then I clean her bottles, and my pump bottles.  I pack my lunch and breakfast for the next day, and prep 2 bottles for Dell Harper. I lay out my clothes for the next day, and take a bath or shower depending on whether I need to wash my hair (I have super thick hair and wash it 2-3 times a week).  If needed, I blow dry my hair.  I run a load of laundry.  If I need to finish up stuff at work I try to get it done. Then, if I am not about to just fall out, I sit down with Hubs and watch a program (usually a 30 minute one!).

Okay, so my advice:

• I like doing everything at night, because it means I get to spend more time with Miss Priss in the morning, when she is her least grumpy and more time at night with Hubs when he is his least grumpy.  I don't think I am allowed to be grumpy anymore at any time of the day.
• Pumping Hints-
• Clothing wise, pull up sweaters and tops, and dresses which zip down the back work the best for me.
• Best advice I received?  Put a big burp cloth in your lap for spills and drips.  The day I forget to do this, I invariably drip milk everywhere.
• Make sure you have something to drink while you pump.
• If you notice your milk supply is low, while you are home with your baby on the weekend, throw in an extra couple of feedings.  Just one or two will help your supply get back up.  If your baby is like mine, she will be sooo happy.
• Make your husband (or boyfriend, or girlfriend, or grandmother, or whoever), a partner.  I realized I was shouldering way too much.  Once I asked, Hubs was down with giving her baths, and he is awesome at diaper changing, and dinner prep. I just needed to enlist his help, instead of being super stressed and acting like a martyr.
• Prioritize but relax.  Your family is more important than a clean kitchen.  Sometimes it's better to snuggle up on the couch with some ice cream, your man, and Modern Family than to have an empty sink.
• Buy multiples.  In case I don't get the dishwasher ran, I have 2 sets of pumping gear and bottles.  This is such a small thing that is so helpful.

Sundays I make a bunch of freezer mini fritittas or a quiche for my breakfasts for the week, and a big batch of soup or quinoa salad (or both) for lunches.  Go ahead and pack them in individual servings.  Also, I keep oatmeal and some soup in my desk drawer for when I forget.

Most important advice I received?  Don't be a perfectionist.  I have a tendency to want everything to be done, and done just so.  I've got to let stuff go.  Sometimes I might have to go to work with my hair in a messy bun.  I might not get to go on a walk, or have a sparkling clean house every day.  Dell Harper might have a meltdown in the Chick-fil-a drive thru (happens every time).  And, it's okay.

Second Verse, Not Quite the Same as the First

Okay, I might have gotten a little too assured in my ability to go to the office.  Someone asked me if it was hard being back at work this morning, and I burst into tears in the elevator!  Mortifying!  Luckily the asker was discreet, and pretended not to notice as a frantically wiped my eyes.

I ended up running home around lunch to feed her and have a quick cuddle.  Much more enjoyable than pumping.

It's so difficult as a woman- truly we are damned if we do, damned if we don't when it comes to motherhood and working.  And honestly, most of us don't really have a choice.  Bills need to be paid. College funds need to be started.  But it is so incredibly difficult to leave your little one.  

Some friends of mine were anxious to get back to work- they need that interaction.  I'm not sure if I do or not, but I hate the disconnect I feel from my baby- I don't know if she smiled or fussed after waking up from her second nap.  My situation with working from home a couple days a week, and having a sitter the other three is pretty much ideal.  It doesn't make it any easier though. . . now I am paranoid that Dell Harper will like her sitter more than me.  Sigh.

However, I think every mama needs to do what is right for them.  Working or staying at home- whatever is best for the individual, because a mother who is happy with her own situation is best for her children (see Betty Draper for the antithesis of this).

I Survived!

The first day back at the office has come and gone.  Dell Harper is in quite good spirits, and I am making it alright. I got a bit sniffly a number of times, but am glad that it's over.  Anticipation, or as my daddy calls it, projecting, is always worse than the actual experience.

I took all of you wise women's advice, and packed my pumping bag, lunch and breakfast, laid out my fancy outfit, and prepared her bottles all the night before.  I sent out a warning e-mail to all the attorneys, instructed my assistant to be my gatekeeper, made a do not disturb sign and pumped at three set times.  It was okay! I made it!

Haha, sleep deprivation leads to a very low bar for what one considers a success.

Success by anyone's terms is coming home to this trio-

  Ha! Dell Harper started fussing the minute I whipped out my phone.  Such drama! My mama is giving an evil chuckle of revenge right now, I am sure.

Anyway, speaking of the fussies, has anyone out there read The Wonder Weeks?

Source: amazon.com via Samma on Pinterest

I just started reading it- so far I really am enjoying it.  Interesting, informative and reassuring!

My Return to a Suit- HELP!

It's hard to believe that a year ago, I was in Italy- it seems like a lifetime and a half ago, yet just the other day.  Isn't it strange how the passage of time changes as we grow older?

Our nanny started yesterday, to get a feel for things before I start work on Monday.  While Dell Harper was napping under a watchful eye, I snuck out to hit up the grocery store.  As I perused Kroger,  I ended up settling on antipasto for dinner.  Perhaps I was subconsciously channeling last year's family trip to Florence?

Perfect meal for a hot spring evening- one that I will keep in my back pocket as things grow increasingly hectic around here beginning next week.  I have become quite anxious about returning to work  For one thing, I have no idea how I am going to manage getting dressed and getting out the door in the morning!  A suit?  Pumping friendly attire?  It sounds so . . .structured and complicated.

I am going to prepare a lot of meals for the freezer tomorrow, as well as try on outfits for the week.  I have no clue what fits and zips.  I have about 5-7 pounds to get back to my fighting weight, but my body is, well, altered.  Um, especially up top.  And I normally wear dresses, but those are not very conducive to pumping.

So working mamas- please help me!  I need advice on

a) getting ready in the morning
b) nursing mama/lady lawyer wear
c) pumping schedules in the office.

I am just scared to death.  Luckily, I will be working from home 2 days a week through the summer, and have a sitter part time the remainder of the week.  She is just as sweet as she can be- I came home from the Kroger yesterday to find Buddy licking her feet!  Ha!

Of course Miss Priss embarrassed the hell out of me and was super grumpy the whole time her new sitter was here, but hopefully she will be better today.  She liked her nanny a lot though, and felt comfortable with her.  Fingers crossed!

The Fall of my Discontent

I'm not really discontented.  I'm more antsy than anything.  I want to leave my fluorescent lit office, and play in the dirt. (ahem, plant my damn pansies).  I want to paint this ugly old hutch that's been patiently waiting on me for a month.  I want to fill the absolutely enormous canvas that's been sitting in my dining room for two months with color and forsythia blossoms.  I want to switch out my closet for fall and wear plaid, tights, and loafer heels!

Instead, I'm preparing corporate documents.

I'm ready for my catalog dream life, people!

Also, in my dream life my yard is a magical fairy tale land made of moss, like this one featured in Southern Living a few years back-

Search "moss garden" on the Southern Living website and you will find the article- it's truly amazing. 

What are you doing right now, and what do you truly long to be doing right this minute??

Legal Eagle

Sorry for lack of posts, but I have not been home nor had a second to breathe the last few days.  I am headed to Nashville at the crack of dawn (literally) tomorrow morning for a Tennessee real estate law conference (are you jealous?) for my continuing legal education.  Not so exciting, but I will get to stay with Miss Shelley who I have not seen since my nuptials.  Whoohoo- we are planning on continuing our December rituals from exam time in law school- movies, working out and shopping.  Luckily, this time we will not be procrastinating our studies while partaking in all three anymore.

This is me, in my lawyer disguise.  So I'll be back , and full of fun things to talk about.  None of which involve real estate law, I promise. 

More Hate Mail

Yay!  It's Boss's Day!!  Overslept so no breakfast.  however, the kitchen is overflowing with delish treats from our staff!!  Hurrah!!

This eased the pain when I had yet another voicemail from the ex-client's crazy son in law.  He was in a bar, drunk.  Awesome. 

However, his threats now extend to one of our partners (who Crazy thinks is a different lawyer with the same last name).  This is a good thing.  Said partner has done several Ironmans, and keeps a gun safe in his office.  He sat and listened to Crazy's message which at one point stated "Tell Partner that if he has the balls to call me back, here's my number and my address. . ."   Ouch.  Insulting Partner's manhood did not go over well.  I think Partner's exact words were "If he comes up here, I'm going to kick his ass."  Eloquent, no?

After hearing a drunk Crazy say that he does not care to go to jail for violating a protective order, (which scares the bejesus out of me, ya'll) I'm all for a little ass kicking!

Hmmmppppphhhh, Help Needed, and Hate from Crazies

So my week has already been pretty poor.  Residual tiredness from UT-UGA game, and the constant rain.  Plus I had Opera Board meeting and a Junior League meeting earlier this week, Intro Knox today, a wedding party Friday night, wedding Saturday, teaching Sunday School, then hosting a baby shower Sunday afternoon.  Whew!  Add in never ending rain, and you have got yourself one grumpy girl.

So for the shower I am making my signature artichoke dip, and adorable favors inspired by the ladies over at The Plan. 

So I am making "Cinnamon-Bun-in-the Oven Scones".  For which I need cinnamon chips.  No problem.  I have seen them in Kroger tons of times.  Apparently not.  Everywhere in Knoxville was out of these darn cinnamon chips.  The lady on the phone at Super Target was super helpful and suggested this baker's supply place.  Jackpot- except no.  They did not have them.  So google to the rescue.  I find some random message board that says you can get the chips at this Amish country market about an hour away.

So I leave work, and head up to Bull's Gap, Tennessee to buy me some cinnamon chips.  Once I got there I also got some good ham for beans/soup, some spicy pimento cheese, and a blackberry jam cake.  I will be back.

Oh yeah- it's an Amish market.

So I get home last night, and start scone making and baking.  Tra, la, la.  The scones taste delicious! 

EXCEPT FOR THE MAJOR PROBLEM!!!!

They spread all over the cookie sheet!  Dripping down to the floor of the oven, which made my smoke detector freak out.  This is turn made me freak out- frantically clawing at the thing in a short girl's attempt to bang the battery out?

So bakers- was my butter not cold enough?  What's the problem?  I blame my oven.  It's gas.  I love a gas cook top, but gas ovens bring the lameness.

So I had a spread-y cinnamon scone this morning for brekkie.  It was a yummy crumbly disaster.  Hmmmppph.

P.S. To top it all off, I had a message waiting for me this morning from an ex-client's son in-law.  He is insane and not supposed to be calling me.  His increasingly crazy/threatening messages were the reason I resigned from representing his mother in law.  Crazy ended his angry message with "Have a heart attack!  Bye!"

Lovely.

WWHHHHHAAAAHHHHH!!!

It's pouring down rain and I working away at the office. It's Sunday afternoon- prime nap time.

Cooking Is My Cardio

So working 8 to 8 yesterday was not very conducive to me hitting the gym. Well, that and the fact that I had an iced pumpkin spiced latte and a cupcake for dinner in the office (and I wonder why I did not sleep well and my tummy hurts today). So thinking about all the things I could be eating (with nutritional value) led to a late post work run to Earthfare (and Kroger) and cooking up a storm!

First up- Taco Soup! After Kiki posted her version of this delight a few days ago, I had a hankering that would not go away. It's September- time for soup!!

First up- saute a chopped onion. Then add in about 2.5 lbs of lean ground beef (I used chopped sirloin) and brown with the onions.

Now it's time to dump some cans. It's a recipe that involves a lot of culinary technical skill, as you can see. This has multiple variations, but here is mine-

2 cans of Pinto Beans

2 cans of Black Beans

2 little cans of green chiles

2 cans diced tomatoes with green chiles (try to get no salt added)

1 can diced tomatoes (try to get no salt added)
2 cans sliced black olives (obviously this is optional. I heart olives so it's a must for me)

1 packet ranch dressing mix

1 packet taco seasoning (try to get reduced sodium)

Rinse your beans- I know I am seeming like a sodium Nazi, but I prefer my rings to fit after eating this soup, so you have to cut it where you can. Dump everything in the pot and stir.

Drain the ground beef-onion mixture and toss that in. Cook on low for forever! You don't have to, but the longer this melds, the better it tastes.

This morning I was starting to serve some up for my lunch at work, when I realized that I wanted to veggie this up to make it more of a complete meal. Hmmm, what would be good?

Luckily I had a huge bag of the holy trinity in my freezer. So I dumped that in my dutch oven, turned the eye on low, and nervously tried a new addition to taco soup. I hope it's a good add on! (I just tried it- excellent addition!).

Also- this recipe is pretty healthy (besides the killer sodium levels, which are easy to reduce), if you are jumping on Weight Watchers Wednesdays , this soup is great. Depending on how you make it, one cup ranges between 2-4 points, and it's VERY filling. Add in extra veggies like me (I think sauteed diced red and yellow peppers would be great in this), and you will get even more soup for your point. Can't wait for my dinner now!

Cute Target Outfit (aka I went in for face wash and spent $80)

So of course I could not find it on the website (because it sucks). However, I am totally digging my new Merona Mad Men vibe duo today. I love this because its structured, wearable year round, and I can mix and match since its separates. Also, digging the roll neck collar, and back pleating on the skirt (not shown obviously). It was a little pricey for Target, but so versatile I couldn't resist. I love me some plaid.

Legally Blonde

It's when I get my head shot back, and I look like the above is when I know I am a grownup. Still feel like I am playing dress-up though.

Hmmm, never played "I'm going to be a lawyer, and you be, blah blah blah" though.

Priorities

This is what my desk looks like. Yet I am playing with my new camera (thanks Mama and Daddy)!

Off to the Opera

Tra la! I'm off to an Opera board meeting (I'm my city Opera's general counsel- it makes me feel quite fancy). However, board meetings are not the ideal way to spend your birthday- I'll be off in la la land thinking of the Pat Conroy book which is awaiting me at family birthday dinner. Sigh.

Last Year

Just realized that this time last year I had just completed taking bar (ugh) and was about to get engaged in approximately an hour. Happy engagement anniversary to Hubs (do people celebrate that milestone?)!

Garden and Gun- are you hiring?

I am a newlywed, and while enjoying my sudden influx of free time after spending the last 9 months of my life planning a wedding and renovating my now hubby's bachelor pad (complete hovel no more), I have realized I have a lot of unfocused creative energy. Somehow, this energy refuses to be directed into the composition of thank you notes (I'm a rude horrible person and detest writing them- slowly but surely they will be done). Instead, the energy has gone into daydreams of quitting the legal world and becoming Julia Reed. Unfortunately, I have no idea how to become a magazine writer. This is sad because I am a proud grad of the University of Georgia Grady College of Journalism and Mass Communication (advertising major).


Anyway, so instead of writing the super fun Declaration of Conditions, Easements, Covenants, and Restrictions I should be writing, I find myself daydreaming of traipsing around trying new kinds of barbeque and interviewing grizzled old bluesman playing in juke joints in the Delta. Sigh. Of course wearing this-


Tunics are obviously not appropriate legal attire, but for hard-eating investigative barbeque journalist? Ideal!